Maternity Hospital

Have I mentioned yet that me and my siblings (Eliza, Shannah, Wendy, Shane, Linnea) played some crazy games when we were little?  Once, my cousins were over, (Ashley, Isaac, Anna) and we decided to play maternity hospital.  Except there was once hitch.  We didn't want to just have a baby and leave.  So, we had a weird clinic where you had to come to the hospital once you found out you were pregnant, and you could leave when the baby turned two.  So, we found a nice little grassy area with trees placed in a line about 15 feet apart each.  We then placed a porch swing at the front of the line between two of the trees, and that was the receptionist's desk.  Now, what to do about rooms?  We took several snow sleds and horse blankets from the barn, and lots of sheets, blankets, and pillowcases from the house.  Then, we placed a sled at the bottom of each tree, and made the "bed" (which was the sled) with a horse blanket or two for a mattress, and blankets and sheets for....blankets and sheets.  The pillowcases were used to make a bunch of scraggly elementary school girls look pregnant.  I was the receptionist, ultrasound lady, doctor, nurse, surgeon, doula, midwife, maintenance man, laundry lady, maid, and counselor. 
Whew.  Each of the 5 girls playing (except me) were taken to their rooms, and I had a nice stack of baby dolls behind an unoccupied tree, just waiting until someone went into labor.  I bustled around, checking on women, then, alas, Ashley had a contraction!  I ran to her room, and said, "Ash, how far apart are your contractions?!"  The eight-year-old looked rather confused, and said, "Well, there's one here *points to elbow*, and one here *points to heel*. "  I heard a scream from the bed next to Ash.  Uh oh.  Shannah.  The  also eight year old looks at me and says, "HELP!  MY CONTRACTIONS ARE 3 INCHES APART!"  Panic swells the room as Anna, Wendy, and Liza all chime in about their various thumb contractions.  Shannah didn't know how to act like she was in labor, so she just sat halfway up and proceeded to have a seizure, screaming the whole time like here arms were being torn from her body.  Ahhh, drama.  They finally finished labor in about 10 minutes, so I went to distribute babies.  I looked behind me.  Uh oh.  The proud mothers all stopped, stared in shock, then started screaming.  You see, in all the laboring confusion, I did not keep an eye on the plastic dolls.  But someone else did.  The horrid sight before our eyes was Shane and Isaac, ages 6 and 4, running away with about 5 dolls tied by the feet to a stick they carried across their shoulders, yelling, "Hey, Isaac, let's go make soup!  HA HA HA!"
*Lots of screaming and yelling and laughing*.